McVerry, party of three!

  I think I’m still in shock that we are actually in the car…driving Olivia home! Of course I’m not driving-I’m just snapping all the pictures.  This is a huge appreciation post to all the staff at the NICU, friends, family, strangers, coworkers…people who prayed for us, advocated with us, listened, cried,  and laughed with us, held our hands through the difficult times, and celebrated the wins.   As we were wheeling through the halls…back tracking the way Kevin and I came speeding up over four months ago…so many emotions. When we arrived…Olivia was given  60% survival chance.  The day she was born that percent had jumped to 80%.  And here we are today…a living breathing miracle and proof of the power of God. This is not the birth story I hoped for, or the first four months of motherhood I envisioned-but I would never ever take back what I’ve gained. We are so thankful for Olivia!  Thank you to everyone again for support and prayer, kind words and...

  Christmas Eve! And here’s a photo dump 🥰 Some good news-even though it isn’t what we hoped for. Insurance has finally accepted an oxygen delivery service and found equipment! Unfortunately, because of Christmas, it will be the 28th when they can deliver it to our house. So we are here until then! The doctor has been fantastic and is still advocating for us to get out sooner-enlisting the higher ups at the hospital. Unfortunately we haven’t heard any word or they haven’t been able to pull strings. Kevin and I are going to make the best of the situation. Spending the night tonight all together as a family…probably ordering something fun to eat, like pizza (no salads or veggies tonight!)…and enjoying “free” cable with an unlimited movie channel (which we’ll switch to hallmark when Kevin falls asleep!).  It’s crazy that I’m not more upset by having to stay an additional week for insurance reasons…but I’m really not. I am so beyond thankful that Olivia is healthy enough to have ...

Believe it or not these are the only pictures I have from the last couple days! It’s been a busy few days at the hospital. Olivia has been doing so well. The doctor has us all planned to discharge before Friday! Kevin and I have been continuing to split shifts so that one of us is constantly there. We have, as of yesterday, hit all the “going home” milestones. Olivia passed her hearing test, passed her car seat test, and Kevin and I passed all our education ‘tests’. She did lose a little bit of weight over night so Kevin and I are wondering if that will keep us any extra days but seems unlikely. The really big hang up right now is home health and the delivery of oxygen. Long story but something with supply being low and insurance only accepted by a couple oxygen delivery services that support neonates. The doctor was frustrated that this is the hurdle we are stuck on and has commissioned his boss, two case managers, the director of social services, and the director of case manager on f...

  I completely forgot the feeling of working night shift until this morning. Kevin and I are back to taking shifts at the hospital-but I am so full of joy I don’t think the tiredness has fully set in! Olivia did outstanding on her feeding schedule. She hit her goal for intake and gained weight. She is now a hefty 7 lbs 13.9 oz!! I love her cute outfits, but still really love when she’s unwrapped and I can see all her chunks! Oh and this elf hat-I think one of the nurses made them for all the babies. I’ve had too much fun making Olivia take pictures with it. But like her dad, even if she doesn’t love it, she puts up with it for me. The sleepovers will continue until Olivia is discharged…which is now becoming a real possibility of happening this upcoming week. She is still on oxygen-and it sounds like this will be something that gets weaned as an outpatient. But Kevin and I are continuing to believe in miracles and that she will come home completely tube free.  Her oxygen was tu...

  Yikes. Missed a few days! It’s been a pretty stressful week…and very busy with work. In my last post I mentioned Olivia’s decrease in desire to eat. It was awful. Several days of tears and frustration from both Kevin and I. The feeding tube conversation always made me anxious. I never ever imagined any of this for my child. On Friday 12/17 she had started to slowly increase her intake but was still only taking 50% of her feeds orally. Before heading into the hospital Friday, I had a giant cry session with my mom.  When I got to the hospital Olivia wouldn’t stop holding my hand. Of course I was emotional all over again thinking of the relationship I have with my mom and how I am longing for the same with my daughter. Olivia ended up taking 77% of her feeds for the day.  I was (and am) over the moon. I also was approved for maternity leave AND found out Olivia’s eye exam went perfect. No more eye exams except routine. The retinopathy is completely healed. Today the doctor...

After my post on Sunday afternoon I was filled with confidence that Olivia’s eating had taken off. She finished Sunday with an oral intake of 71%! Going into Monday I was over the moon with the end in sight! Unfortunately, for whatever reason, Olivia was sleepy and uninterested in eating on Monday. This continued into today. Doctor's are starting to have conversations with Kevin and I about the potential for a semi permanent feeding tube. It's upsetting to me-and to be honest until we know for sure I don't want to go into too many details about this. Basically it would be a tube that is outside her body and goes through her belly to her stomach for direct access to feed her.  For now, the doctors want to try to strictly use formula and see if that changes her interest. Literally Kevin and I have them trying everything before any type of real surgery discussions. Honestly, I just have to completely give it to God because it seems like no one knows why she isn’t eating fully....

  So little lady took not one, not two, but three whole bottles today!  As you can see…she was just as happy about it as we were. She was also happy because I let her be naked most of the day 🤫. Really it is okay-we we’re doing lots of skin to skin. Skin to skin(kangaroo care) is supposed to help with brain development, bonding, digestion, sleep…and a whole host of other things, including helping with appetite 🤷🏻‍♀️. Trying all the things to get her to eat-plus, honestly, I love when she’s naked so I can see all her sweet baby rolls!  Olivia’s still weighing in at 7lbs 4 oz. She had some fluctuation the last few days while adjusting to the new additive in her milk and new medications. Kevin and I are feeling hopeful as she is doing better with feeds that she will continue to gain weight. Yesterday she finished the day with 63% oral feeds. It is taking lots of patience but we have been really focusing on how blessed we are. This has just been a time for us to really lov...

Happy “due” date! Very minimal updates. Olivia has increased her oral feeding to about 65%. She has been started on new medication that will hopefully help her belly not be so upset during and after eating. The doctors want to make sure she can eat about 85-100% before we talk discharge. So we are getting close! Making sure she eats is so important in avoiding problems down the road. Although it’s slow going, and sometimes we don’t understand the medical logic completely, we are thankful and encouraged by her progress.  In remembering to chose to have a thankful heart, I am focusing on how much Olivia has grown and how much God has blessed us with bringing her into our lives. I am happy to report Olivia continues to grow into a happy little social butterfly. She never wants to miss a thing and is known to have mastered the “sleeping with one eye open”. Although she does tend to prefer Kevin and I, she never turns down a good conversation and cuddle with anyone who is willing too....

Olivia has been slowly improving over the last three days & taking anywhere between 51-58% of her feeds by mouth. I’ve been very encouraged by the increase in numbers. I’m not entirely sure why, other than it’s 2 days before her ‘due’ date…but the team of doctors are pulling out all the stops to optimize feeds. Sort of wondering why they didn’t do this earlier, but that’s neither here nor there at this point. The doctor during rounds today alluded to going home with a feeding tube if we start getting to the 43 week mark.  With the changes to her feeding mixture to help decrease ref lux and the continued oxygen, hopefully she will reach 100% of her feeds orally and we won’t have to have this conversation! Oh and I know people enjoy hearing her weight gain…she’s up to 7 lbs 4 ounces and 18.1 inches. Growing so quickly! Packing up and putting away her preemie clothes hit me hard last night. Don’t get me wrong, I am beyond thankful she is growing…just wasn’t fully prepared for how ...

Happy birthday dad!!  Today was Kevin’s birthday…and although he and Olivia aren’t birthday twins like he was hoping…he still got to spend time with her today. (Which wouldn’t have been the case, obviously, if she didn’t come early!). One of Olivia’s best friends picked out the perfect outfit (ignore the spit up stain 🤦🏻‍♀️) and I threw on a festive bow.  We are continuing to work on feedings. She did take another full bottle yesterday during a care time. So we know she can do it…it’s just getting over the hump of doing it consistently. Don’t want her to come home only to turn around and be back in the hospital again if she stops eating. Another positive, besides the whole bottle yesterday, is that she is consistently eating more than last week…between 35-40% the last two days. Praying this continues and that we get our miracle baby home very soon! Still no discharge date yet…for those that ask…once she is eating above 75% consistently I think we will have a better idea of a...

39 weeks today! I just love her surprised/shocked look. So funny.  I’ll keep it short since my last post was so long. Really no changes-we are still working on oral feedings. The last twenty four hours she only consumed 23% by mouth. Today though, she did take a whole bottle! Hopefully she keeps this up through the evening and weekend. We are remembering to celebrate wins though…and that was a big one! Olivia is also up to 6 lbs 11oz!! She’s officially been upgraded to newborn clothes-the nurses say she’s getting hard to squeeze into her preemie clothes.  She’s also been getting “bored”. Since she’s getting bigger the nursing staff has been entertaining her in various ways-especially when Kevin and I are not there… She still isn’t completely sure about the bouncy chair but appreciates being out of her crib…or as Kevin puts it “her baby jail”. 

100. This was my best shot of Olivia also feeling exasperated by that number! At this point I can practically get to the NICU with my eyes closed. I know all the receptionists-most ask about Olivia, I know about 90% of the nurses and doctors, and I know which floor has the best vending machine depending on your snack of choice.  I’m not sure if I’ve just become delirious or the prayers for peace are washing over me-definetly the latter-but I have such a calm spirit when reflecting and realizing how far we’ve come and how much further we have to go.  Before I go into too many medical updates- Olivia is up to 6lbs 8oz! She had her eye exam today and the retinopathy is c ontinuing to heal itself (so a good eye exam!). She has another eye exam in two weeks and the doctor made an outpatient appointment just in case 🤞🏼!  Olivia’s ability to take in her full ordered feeds by mouth is still being hindered by her stamina. (Here’s where this post may get medical so I apologize.) ...